Happy Birthday Caleb!

Today my baby turns 6 years old. He actually hit the official mark just a few short minutes ago... 6:46am. No one in the house is awake to know that but me. I've slept very little... kind of reminds me of 6 years ago when I was awake in labor all night long. This wasn't that tough, thankfully, but a long night nonetheless. My baby is 6... and he's going to spend this day sick. He started running a fever late last night, and I've spent most of the night listening to him struggle to breathe in the monitor. We'll have to cancel our 2 parties. Not sure what we're going to do with the 3 cakes I baked, or all of the food I've made, or the 70 drinks on ice, or the goody bags for all of his friends that he won't get to see today. But, even without what we'd planned, and how I had anticipated this day being, he's still 6.

I wanted this to be the best birthday he'd ever had. And so there's that part of me just really frustrated that he's going to miss out. But I know that this is also an opportunity for me to demonstrate our family's love for him. And that even in the midst of illness and disappointment, we can choose joy. He's been learning about joy during the month of April. Joy means "choosing to be happy even when things don't go my way." To be honest, I'll be the one who struggles with joy today more than him. I've been the one running like a crazy woman for the last week, and battling my own illness on little sleep, to give him his dream day. But, now's my chance to live out what we've been teaching him over the past 3 weeks. Things aren't going to go our way today. But, we can choose to be joyful in the midst of it. We can make this day as much fun as possible with a high fever and nasty congestion. Because we have each other. Mostly, because we have Jesus. He is enough to give us joy beyond measure. And we will celebrate the last 6 years of his life that have brought me the most joy you can experience on earth.

So, Happy Birthday Caleb! I love you more deeply than I could ever express to you, and you have filled my heart with joy each and every precious day of your life. You will never really understand how God has used you in my life to teach me so much about who He is. You are a blessing, an amazing little boy, and we will celebrate your life today... with 3 cakes!!! I love you!

Joy

It's kind of funny... when I started this blog, I thought at the time that I would try to post something every day. Well, I was pretty delusional that cold winter morning to think that I could come up with a clear thought each day. I'm averaging once a week lately... kind of sad that I am not thinking more clearly than that. But, I have 2 adorable, hilarious, loving little guys that keep me from thinking clearly most of the time. So, today as I cleared out the last 2 1/2 months worth of pictures off of my camera to free up some space for some hopefully adorable Easter pics, I thought I'd share a few pics of those adorable, hilarious, loving little guys... the ones that are sucking my brain cells out daily, but I'm OK with it... they're completely worth losing my mind!

The boys' first snow of their lives... and the world's smallest snowman



















100th day of school... the kids dressed up like they were 100 years old



















Our little Pirate... or Pirick, as he says...















And some of my dearest friends... another source of my joy















Life is good!

Blogging Fun

One of my favorite blogs to read each day is Lysa TerKeurst's blog. She does lots of fun things with her blog, and offers much Biblical insight for the ladies who read there. Today she's doing a Swap & Hop. You can go to her blog, and jump around to lots of other ladies' blogs to get ideas about organization (last week was recipes). So, I'm joining in with a little idea that is not originally mine, but I've used it in the past to help me stay organized. I used to be a very organized person - these days, not so much. One day I will be again... I hope! :-)

Pantyhose/Tights/Knee-Hi's/Trouser Socks Drawer
Instead of having a big pile of all of the above, take ziploc bags and sort and store your pantyhose, tights, knee-hi's, etc. in separate bags with labels on them. For example, all black tights go in a ziploc labeled "black tights". All nude pantyhose go in a ziploc labeled "nude hose". All brown trouser socks go in a drawer labeled "brown trouser socks". You get the idea. So, when you're ready to get dressed in the morning, you're not searching through a big knotted up pile of various colors and textures of nylons. Just hit the right bag, pull out what you need, and you're done. Then line up all of your bags from light colors to dark colors in your drawer, and you can spot what you're looking for quickly.

Hope this idea is helpful for someone today. Since I don't work outside of my home like I used to, I don't wear many of those fabulous ladies undergarments anymore. But when I do, I can easily find them. Many other things I can't find, though. Can't wait to get some new ideas from Lysa's blog today!

Have a wonderful day!
Psalm 130:7
Put your hope in the Lord. For there is faithful love with the Lord and with Him is redemption in abundance.

Experience His faithful love and abundant redemption today!

The Harvest

I love it when God takes a passage of scripture that I've heard multiple times in my life, and He opens my eyes to see it and hear it as if I've never heard it before. That happened to me this past Saturday as I was working through the "Stepping Up" Bible study by Beth Moore. Scripture came alive, and I was so excited and renewed by it, that I could hardly stand it. I preached a mini-sermon of it to Randy when He got home (poor fella), and I have been chewing on it all week. Years ago, Randy actually preached on this same passage on several different occasions, with great visuals I might add, but that may have been the last time that it was before my eyes. And I needed to hear it again. I will try not to preach my mini-sermon here (so I don't have to say "poor you" to you), but I might not be the only person who needed to see this in a fresh way, so here goes...

In Luke 8, Jesus had just shared a parable with the crowds who were following Him, about a farmer who was sowing his seed. Some seed fell on the path, some on the rocks, other seed fell on the thorns, and then seed fell onto the good soil. Then he gave the following explanation:

Luke 8:11-15 11 "This is the meaning of the parable: The seed is the word of God. 12 Those along the path are the ones who hear, and then the devil comes and takes away the word from their hearts, so that they may not believe and be saved. 13 Those on the rock are the ones who receive the word with joy when they hear it, but they have no root. They believe for a while, but in the time of testing they fall away. 14 The seed that fell among thorns stands for those who hear, but as they go on their way they are choked by life's worries, riches and pleasures, and they do not mature. 15 But the seed on good soil stands for those with a noble and good heart, who hear the word, retain it, and by persevering produce a crop.

I have spent a lot of time in the last few years pondering why believers, namely myself, can hear the Word of God, feel inspired by it, excited about it, and then still struggle so dang much with life, freedom (or lack thereof), inconsistency in our walk with God, etc. Verse 14 just jumped right off the page at me this time. We become choked by life's worries, choked by life's riches, and choked by life's pleasures. I found it so interesting that riches and pleasures were referred to as thorns. The very things that we seek out...more money, more stuff, feeling good, pleasures of the world... they can be the very thorns that choke us and keep us from what God has for us. I will willingly claim to have let the worries of life choke me, keeping me from maturing in my faith and from producing a harvest from the seed thrown onto my life. But, wow... how many times have I let the pursuit of happiness, pleasure, and security, choke me and keep me from maturing in my faith and from producing a harvest. I want to mature. I want the thorns gone. I want God to produce a harvest in my life.

So, as verse 15 says, in order to mature and produce a crop, we must pursue the heart of God, which transforms our heart to reflect His. I must hear the Word... read it, study it, digest it, talk about it with fellow believers. I must retain it... memorize it, digest it, speak it. And I must persevere. I must persevere! When life is tough, I must persevere! When I don't understand God, I must persevere! When I don't like my circumstances, I must persevere! And then God will bring about a harvest in my life. Only then. There's no shortcut.

OK, well I guess I did preach the sermon... (poor you!) But, I think I mainly was preaching it to myself.

James 1:2-6
Consider it PURE JOY, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

I don't want to lack anything. I want my life to produce a harvest. I will persevere.

God Threw My Fear in the Trash

This past Monday night, we got to experience some rough storms for the 2nd time in a week. For some reason, I felt compelled to talk about it all day Monday, to prepare myself somehow from what might happen. Which meant that when Caleb was with me, he heard me mention the possibility of storms several times. If I could do it over, I would have kept my mouth shut, because he didn't need to be alarmed just because I was a little nervous. But, for whatever reason, I brought it up from time to time. My big mouth!!

Well, at bedtime Monday night, Caleb was a little hesitant about going to sleep. He had noticed my concern about the storms, and had seen some of the damage that the previous week's storms had done near his school. So, he said, "Mommy I'm scared. I don't want to go to sleep." So, I said, "Well, let's pray about that because God is in control and there's no need to be afraid." So, we proceeded to pray and ask God to take away Caleb's fears and give him peace so he would sleep all night. We held up our arms in the air and handed the fears to God.

Well, Caleb slept great, and in spite of lots of thunder, lightning, and loud rain, he never made a sound. So, the next morning, he climbed into bed right before we got ready for school, and we asked him if the rain had woken him up. He said, "Yes, but I wasn't afraid. I gave my fears to God, and He took them from me, and just threw them in the trash. So, I wasn't afraid." Very matter of fact. No doubts. God took them, He knew they weren't worth anything, and chunked them in the garbage. Done!!! We were elated. Another reminder of God's grace on our precious boys.

So... a few weeks ago, Brennan reminded us to throw our fears in the potty (Fluoride in the Potty), this week Caleb showed us that God will take that fear and just trash it. We just have to give it to him! I love that sweet little boy! Thank you, Father, for teaching me about you through the eyes and heart of an almost-six-year-old!

Aliens

Dear friends, I urge you, as aliens and strangers in the world, to abstain from sinful desires, which war against your soul. 1 Peter 2:11 (NIV)

Friends, this world is not your home, so don't make yourselves cozy in it. Don't indulge your ego at the expense of your soul. 1 Peter 2:11 (The Message)

Aliens. I am one. If you are a follower of Christ, then you are one too. Webster's dictionary defines aliens like this: a) belonging or relating to another person, place, or thing; b) differing in nature or character typically to the point of incompatibility.

This world is not my real home. I am here temporarily, and I am not supposed to fit into it. But, that very statement goes against my humanness. I get up every morning and am tempted to live in a way that appears that I think I will be here forever. I work hard to fit into the environments where I find myself, and I desire nothing less for my children. I want to "fit" here. I want my children to "fit" here... with our peers, with the clothes we wear, the activities we do. Most of us can easily remember times when we knew for sure we didn't fit in somewhere... and we hated that feeling. So, we either choose to never put ourselves in those places again, or we try to change and become a person who will most definitely fit there the next time.

But, the Bible calls us "aliens and strangers in the world". I am not supposed to fit here. I am not supposed to spend my days dwelling on everything that is temporary... too busy for God because I'm trying to build up something here on earth. Life is not about stuff. It's not about success. It's not about fitting in. I am supposed to be uncomfortable on this planet. As soon as I start to get real cozy here, I will indulge my ego at the expense of my soul, as The Message says. I will begin to think that being here is all about me, and I will sell my soul to whatever fleeting, temporary pleasure that is placed in front me, and lose out on the REAL life that Jesus came to bring.

When I have visited foreign countries in the past, I have never once tried to pretend I was from there, because I would quickly look like an idiot. I am clearly American, with a hick accent they could barely discern, and I stood out as different. I didn't try to speak the language, because that would be beyond embarrassing. I struggled with the food because it wasn't what I was used to or I was afraid it would make me sick. I looked around my environment in child-like wonder because it was so different from what I call home. I didn't know what anyone around me was saying. I couldn't read anything. I knew I was different. And I was OK with it. I knew I was there temporarily, so I didn't feel pressure to become like them. Isn't that how the believer’s life should be?

Based on Webster's, I live in this world, but in reality, my heart and soul belong to another... to Jesus and to life with Him. My nature should be so different from the world around me that there should be glaring incompatibilities between me and my surroundings. I fear that most of us who believe in Christ, myself included, are not willing to be exposed as incompatible to the world. We so desperately want to belong, that the life we desire eludes us because we are holding onto a life that can never fulfill us. But we're too afraid to let go. What if people think we're weird? What if God wants to use my money for things other than pleasing myself? What if God wants me to share my story with others and people will know the real me? The “what ifs” could go on and on. Christ came to earth to give us vibrant, fulfilling life. But we only get to taste parts of that here. For the fullness of life will come when we are in His physical presence in eternity, where there is no more pain, no more tears, no more fear. But, with Him as our daily companion, abundant life is available to us here on planet earth, but ONLY if we are submitted to Him, and embrace the alien-like nature of our existence here. Jesus himself said it in John 10:10 “I have come that you may have life, and have it to the full.”

I wrestle with the reality of my temporary and eternal existences daily. Sometimes it is clearly in front of my face, other times it's not. But, I'm always wrestling. Always struggling to focus on what really matters. I don’t have all of the answers… my questions continue to mount. But, I want to embrace my status as an Alien. God has placed us here for great purpose…but we can only fulfill that purpose when we view life here as temporary, fight with His power against the draw of our flesh, and pursue a calling greater than ourselves to bring Christ glory.

I am an alien. I hope you are one too. I am so glad that we have each other during our temporary visit here…

Water Weight

I am convinced I have a problem with water weight. On any given day I am certain that I am retaining 5 to 7 pounds of it. I have a love/hate relationship with the scale, as most women do. If it says what I want it to (which is never), then I love it. If it says what I don't want it to say (which is always), I hate it.

Recently, when I weigh myself, I conclude my time on the scale by mentally deducting 5-7 pounds for the water weight that I am convinced is the problem, which leaves me with a final weight that I can live with. I used to think that this problem only occurred at certain times of the month, but I have changed my thinking on that. Because no matter what time of the month it is, I am having this same problem with the 5-7 pounds. Thus, water weight is a month-long, and year-long problem. There's no way to trace the 5-7 pounds back to the fried food I ate last night, the cookies I ate the last two nights, or the giant blobs of cool whip that I put in the top of every cup of coffee that I drink. Because the cool whip is fat free - so that can't be the problem! (I have to laugh out loud as I type this because it cracks me up that I really do find reasons to deduct weight when I weigh myself in the morning - there's always several things that I am sure are the problem that I will deduct pounds for. How much can underwear weigh????)

In all seriousness, though, or a little seriousness, I guess, I was thinking this morning in the shower about how much that stupid scale can dictate how I feel about myself on any given day. I can get up, look forward to my day, have a positive attitude and good interaction with my family, and then jump on the scale (in hopes that those few pounds I'm tired of seeing are gone), and boom, there goes my happy outlook on life. I am then in a funk, frustrated with myself, analyzing whatever I can remember eating, and then beating myself up all day about it. So silly, yet so true.

So, this morning, after the water weight increased with my morning weigh, and I ran out of things to deduct for, I decided that I am going to put my scale in a place that is so inconvenient to get to, that I wouldn't make the effort. It's just ridiculous for that object made of plastic and metal to have that much power over my mood and my feelings about myself. I had this sweet older lady last week tell me that she weighs every morning... "because if it's good, you can have fun, and if it's not good, you can't have any fun", she said. As cute as she was telling me about it, I certainly don't want to spend the next 50 years of my life letting that object tell me what kind of day I am going to have!

So, I am going to continue eating healthy most of the time, continue exercising most of the time, and enjoy my life! I have decided that a monthly weigh-in is just right - that's only 12 days a year with the potential to be distressing - and a lot less mental calculation to make sure I deduct the right amount of water weight, etc.! Way better than 365 days of having to do all of that! And only once a month that Randy has to drag the ladder out to get to the scale! He'll be so happy.